Karma

Apparently karma is catching up to me. That bitch. I found out that if too much tension is applied to one's Achilles tendon, it will snap. It will snap like a rubber band.

So, I get to spend the next few months recovering from a complete rupture. I am now accepting applications for someone to help nurse me back to health. Please include your measurements and any "special" skills in your application.

Woman Attacked by Pelican

This is a story that actually made Fox news...a chick swimming in the Gulf of Mexico near Treasure Island was attacked by a pelican. Apparently, she was splashing around off shore and then POW! a pelican tries having it's way by beating the hell out of her with his beak. The bird caused 25 stitches worth of cuts and she may have to get plastic surgery.

I can't blame the pelican. I'd be pissed too if I had just figured out that my fishy dinner was really a woman geeking out in the water. Although this was probably just a freak occurance, I'm willing to bet that she'll think twice before going to the beach without feeling clean, fresh, and confident.